6/12 10 Reasons Why some People don’t Go to Church Anymore

For far in this series, we have defined the main terms used in the discussion on why some people have trouble with the ‘Institutional Church’ system.  Then we went onto looking at some of the basic teachings Jesus left for His church, the Jesus Followers.  We saw that He is coming for His bride, one that has worked on the ‘spots and wrinkles’ with the power of the Holy Spirit rather than self effort.

Now we want to address 10 of the most common reasons why many people have walked away from the modern church.  See what you think about their reasons:

Here are 10 of the main reasons people give when faced with the decision to same in their particular ‘box’ or leave.  I have also tried to provide the answers or alternatives to the usual 10 reasons people give. What do you think about the following?

1. The format of the church is always the same!

It’s easy to predict the order of service in many places; it’s the ‘same old, same old’: Opening prayer. One or two Worship songs, welcome and announcements, second song, sermon, Offertory, closing song or songs and prayer.  In many places, the routine leave little room for any movement of the Holy Spirit or for individual participation.

Suggestion: What would you suggest the church to do for every service? I know running a church service is not just a snap of a finger.  It takes time and lots of planning. The church is doing their best to accommodate everyone and everything needed to be presented.  Talk to those in charge or make positive suggestions – if they will listen.

2. Small growth group or Cell group meetings:

The purpose seems always the same: Debate sessions or open discussions? The leaders seem to know all the answers.  Are we meeting as real friends or just a convenient group?  I don’t feel I can let people really know me or I won’t fit in their ideal group.

Suggestion:

How willing are you to be real with others?  Build friendships within the group if possible.  If possible, have some input into choosing the subject material.  Bring the group to a higher level of being real with Jesus.

3.  I question why are others here in this Service.

Are they there out of obligation or excitement? Where is the joy of being in the Lord’s presence?  Where is the touch of the Holy Spirit?  It’s just seems so dry and without relevance to my life.

Suggestions: 

Recognise that being joyful comes from the heart, from within. The church can’t make you rejoice.  You will be disappointed if you look to the church as your Source of feeding or of excitement.

4. Are the people really doing true Ministry to the Lord?

Are people there to just perform and do more and more?   Being in any leadership role means adding more and more to my list until I was burnt out.  I question whether I was known for who I was or for what I did for the congregation.  I can’t please everyone.

Suggestions:

True ministry comes from the Lord, not for the Lord. Often people get burnt out because they are trying to serve God and people. People lack spending time with God, basking in His love before reaching out to the world, why? ,,,because the ‘program’ must be filled!  Serve out of REST, not works.

5. Do people go to church to see their friends and family or to seek God?

People act like the only place to find God is within their four walls.  Coming to God on Sunday seems to be the emphasis without much push to find Him during the week too.

Suggestion:

Seeking and finding God needs to be the centre of our walk with Jesus.  He is there 24×7 days not just waiting for us in the building.  Again, growing your own faith and walk is your responsibility first.  Meeting with others, friends or family who also know the Lord is a good foundation for mutual sharing and growth even outside the church building.

6. People are in the church to follow their own ambitions.  Sometimes it seems just a popularity contest and has nothing to do about Jesus.

Some people have seen the church structure as a place they can build their own power and control over others.  It seems to feed their ego to be ‘that preacher’ who gives good sermons from the front of the audience.  What happened to the ‘Servant Heart’ that Jesus expects in His leaders?

Suggestions:

Sometimes it is the Lord that puts an ambition, or gifting in your heart.  Yes, sometimes, it is the ‘charismatic personality’ rather than their character that puts someone in front of the people.  Believers have suffered at the hands of those who go into service for wrong reasons.  That’s why it is important to let the Holy Spirit cleanse and worked out the ‘Heart motives’ before going into service!

7.  The use of ‘Christian terms’, jargon puts me off.

People in the church use such religious terms – ‘Christianese’ – I can’t understand what they mean or if I do, it has little relevance to my life. Why did I have to look or act different to be holy? Do all Christians have to sound alike?

Suggestions:

Learn the Bible terms for yourself.  The Bible uses big words like ‘sanctification’ so what does it mean to you?  Acting perfect doesn’t mean God will accept us better.  Learn to be yourself and find your walk with Him in confidence.  We have to learn to not be constantly pointing each other but to God as our source of strength and truth. JESUS is your justification and qualification.

8. The church expects me to do too much to get closer to Him.

Drawing near or becoming distant from God? Do I really have to do so much to get closer to Him? Doesn’t He live in and through me?

Suggestions:

Drawing near or becoming distant from God? – How does it draw you away from Him? God doesn’t need your performance to qualify His presence. God doesn’t need your justification to maintain His presence..

9. I listen to the Preaching and wonder if it is really important. Are they doing a grand Lesson plan or sharing Life principles and deep heart stuff?

Some people can sit through anything.  I’ve heard so many sermons but see little results in  those around me.  They still swear, live the worldly lifestyle and don’t seem all that different from the non-believers.  When Jesus really touches your life, you are never the same.

I hunger for deeper teachings than those that ‘just sound great’.  Maybe I need to find a different ‘sheep pen’ but I suspect I would find the same kind of ‘shepherds’ there as well.

Suggestions: This has become very common in Western churches. The speakers give lots of ‘advice’ but lack a depth in explaining the Word of God, the Bible.  Try to let God talk to you even through the most ‘boring’ lectures.  It helps to take notes and let the Holy Spirit talk to you.  It might be something totally different from what is being said up the front.

10. Other people judge me if I don’t go to church.  They say I’m unfaithful, falling away, being rebellious or being a ‘backslider’.

In the group I know that call themselves ‘Christians’, if I left and went with my cousin to the pub on a Sunday, I would be labeled as ‘backslilding’.  I’ve left so many of my old friends behind, who really needed to hear about Jesus.  We seem to cut people off from their past friends when you walked into the church.

How can my old friends find Him if I’m ‘fellowshipping’ with other Christians all the time?  Will I be able to go back to my old friends someday without being labeled?

Comments:

Falling away or finding God? – Going to church doesn’t make you any holier than you sleeping at night.. Just like you driving through McDonald’s and you don’t come out a Big Mac.. Not going to church is just a missed opportunity to fellowship with other people and friends.. You’ll never know what God can bring when we having fellowship with others.. Of course one will justify by saying “we can fellowship some other time”, yes but then you’re limiting to that opportunity.

Yes, it is sad that too often those who come into the church as new Christians seem to be encouraged to cut off from the worldly friends they had.  …but where will they find Jesus if you can’t still talk with them?  As you grow and mature in your faith, you can be with those people who want to find truth.  The question is – who is stronger?  …your worldly friends who will pull you back into the world, or your faith that will throw out a life raft to help them?

Adapted from ’10 Reasons Why I Don’t Go to Church Anymore’ by Remy Tongol

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Author’s comments:  I have been in meeting where I thought to myself “This is the more boring, irrelevant message I have ever heard!” ……and you know what, 50% of the congregation came forward for prayer.  I  have also been in meeting where the formal words and rituals left my friends cold, …but I was deeply touched by the Holy Spirit.

It just goes to show, you can get ‘nothing’ out of the best message, or something out of the ‘dead’ message’; it’s a hart attitude and listening to the Holy Spirit that makes the difference.

Susanne Fengler, Blog Author

www.christianfoundations.jesus-treeoflife.info/blog

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