6/17 26 funny One-Liners about God in the light of Christian Foundations
To add some lighter humour to our series, here is a funny post from a friend:
26 One-liners About the Church and our Creator!
1. Give God what’s right — not what’s left.
2. Man’s way leads to a hopeless end — God’s way leads to an endless hope.
3. A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing.
4. He who kneels before God can stand before anyone.
5. In the sentence of life, the devil may be a comma — but never let him be the period.
6. Don’t put a question mark where God puts a period.
7. Are you wrinkled with burden? Come to the church for a faith-lift.
8. When praying, don’t give God instructions — just report for duty.
9. Don’t wait for six strong men to take you to church.
10. We don’t change God’s message — His message changes us.
11. The church is prayer conditioned.
12. When God ordains, He sustains.
13. WARNING: Exposure to the Son may prevent burning.
14. Plan ahead — It wasn’t raining when Noah built the ark.
15. Most people want to serve God, but only in an advisory position.
16. Suffering from truth decay? Brush up on your Bible.
17. Exercise daily — walk with the Lord.
18. Never give the devil a ride — he will always want to drive.
19. Nothing else ruins the truth like stretching it.
20. Compassion is difficult to give away because it keeps coming back.
21. He who angers you controls you.
22. Worry is the darkroom in which negatives can develop.
23. Give Satan an inch & he’ll be a ruler.
24. Be ye fishers of men — you catch them and He’ll clean them.
25. God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
26. Read the Bible — It will scare the hell out of you.
Church Signs
“Don’t give up. Moses was once a basket case!”
“The best vitamin for a Christian is B1”
“Under same management for over 2000 years”
“Soul food served here”
“Don’t wait for the hearse to take you to church”
“Life has many choices, Eternity has two. What’s yours?”
“Walmart isn’t the only saving place!”
“Prevent truth decay. Brush up on your Bible”
“It’s hard to stumble when you’re down on your knees”
“What part of “THOU SHALT NOT” don’t you understand?”
“Never give the devil a ride. He will always want to drive”
“Can’t sleep? Try counting your blessings”
“Forbidden fruit creates many jams”
“Christians, keep the faith… But not from others!”
“Satan subtracts and divides. God adds and multiplies”
“If you do not want to reap the fruits of sin stay out of the Devil’s orchard”
“To belittle is to be little”
“Don’t let the littleness in others bring out the littleness in you”
“God answers knee mail”
We hope you have had a good laught at some of these comments,
Susanne Fengler, Blog Author
www.christianfoundations.jesus-treeoflife.info
Tags: Oe liners about God, One Liners about God
Filed under: Challenges to the Christian Faith
This was a really good piece if humour so that’s for reminding us of the more important things in our faith. Really had a good laugh with some of this. Keep up the good work!